Sick

Somewhere between yesterday and last night I got sick. I spent a few hours on the couch reading book two in the "Game of Thrones" series which was great. I love the show and the books are great, but they are so detailed and I am having a hard time reading them. I want to read all of them, but it seems to be taking forever to get through book two.

After that, I got into "Mad Man" again. We had Netflix, canceled it and got it back. So I'm almost done with with season 1. I'm sorry, I'm slow. And behind. I have 4 more seasons to go.

And how did I get sick? I don't even know. I'm not happy either.

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The last Saturday in September

Unfortunately, I used my Saturday morning to sleep in and not workout. I work up after a little after 10am. Did have plans to make it to the gym, but that didn't happen. I'm not a fan of going to the gym past 10am on a Saturday morning. It's too crowded and I like having my workouts done by that time. I started to curse myself and feel upset, but it's not worth it. It really isn't it. Instead, I decided to have a nice healthy breakfast instead.

I had forgotten all about my maple coffee we got in Vermont. I need to get some more PB2. I Good stuff.

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That's right, Honey Boo Boo. That's right.

Now excuse me while I go and try to convince the husband to take me to Ikea tomorrow. I keep telling him they have a 99 cent breakfast. 

What did you eat for breakfast today?

Here we go

I have to thank you all for your kind words on twitter and the comments you left on yesterdays blog. It was hard to write, but it felt good after I did it.  Thank you all so very much.

Here is what I started off today with:

Sorry it's sideways. I tried like hell to get it going in the right direction but whatever. I took a million pictures of this damn scale before I got right, too.

192.4 pounds. That is what I am starting at. Friday was always a good weigh in day for me. Hopefully next Friday I'll see 191 or so. Hitting the gym tomorrow and grocery shopping after.


Going to make this sometime this week. Doesn't it look awesome? I love chicken, I love zucchini. It's a win/win right there. I can't wait to try it out. I'm always looking for a new recipe idea. Thanks to the lovely Cely for that.

This is hard

I've been trying to figure out how to write this post. It's a hard post to write. I've been telling myself I was going to write this blog all week.

Suzi wrote about it.

Jen wrote about it.

It started back in April when I took out my summer clothes for our trip to Texas and nothing fit. My capri pants were too small. My dresses were too snug. My tank tops too tight. I thought, well, it's not that bad. I've gained 15 pounds, I can go on vacation and when I get back, I'll lose it.

When our vacation rolled around for Florida in August, I'd be fine. I'd have lost the 15 pounds and be back at 160 pounds, a comfortable weight.  Just keep eating healthy, counting your points and running. You'll get back to wear you want to be.


In June, the husband and I decided we were going to try and have a baby. We were ready and it just felt right. I was pretty excited and started planning all the fun things I was going to do to the spare room. However, after a couple months of trying, I decided that I wanted to put that idea on hold because of my weight gain.


If you haven't noticed, and you may not have, I didn't post any pictures from my picture to Texas. I posted some on Facebook, but not a lot. I wasn't too comfortable with myself at that point, even though being 175 pounds wasn't as bad as uncomfortable as when we went to Florida in August. I hated every single picture that was taken of me on that trip and I won't be posting any of those pictures any time soon.


That is when I knew I had gained enough weight to start becoming ashamed of myself again.


2012 has not been the stellar year I had hoped it would be for me weight wise. I had hoped to get down to 150 pounds, but that didn't happen. I thought I would try other things that might help me reach that goal. I struggled. I've been a bad blogger and there is no excuse for that. I kept telling myself, you have time, you have time.

But, I clearly did not have time. Those 15 pounds I had quickly turned into 20 and those 20 turned into 25. And as of this morning they were 32. 31.8 to be exact.

I weigh 191.8 pounds. I've gone up and down over the past couple of months or so. I've seen 187. I've seen 194. But, I always seem to stay between those numbers.

I blame me. I can't blame anyone else. It's my fault for eating half a cake some nights. Or drinking too much. Or two (or more) sleeves of cookies. All in the same night.

I know what works for me to lose weight. It's Weight Watchers. Counting my points and working out 4-5 days a week. That is what works. I can't keep trying other things when they don't work.

I just want to lose 10-15 pounds at this point so that when we go to New Orleans in December I'll feel a little more comfortable. And so that in January we can start trying to have a baby again. I'll worry about the rest of the weight after the pregnancy.

I am going to start blogger more. I promise!!

Not working

You ever feel like you need a change? Like when it comes to your food? I love my exercise routine. My running and my weight lifting. I love that.

But I am one of those people that eats the same the same things all the time and that my dear friends, is very boring. I've spent most of today in a little bit of a funk. And I got to thinking about what I need to do about my eating. I know I can't go too off the beaten path because some things don't work for me. But I do like the idea of The Whole 30 but not without having to give up some of the foods I love (like Ketchup).

I can't give up my dairy 100%, but I can cut down on it as much as possible. And I can eat more vegetables and more healthy fats.

I'm going to see what I can come up with.

You just never know.

Because what I'm doing is not working anymore. 

Life is good.

My attitude towards food has changed a lot over the past few weeks. I can't exactly explain it, but it has.

I spent most of this week eating when I was hungry and stopping when I wasn't. It wasn't about how many points is this and no I can't have that.

I'm not sure what is going on in my head, but I like it. A lot. I'm starting to realize that if I'm hungry and it's healthy, it's okay to eat it. If I'm hungry and it's not healthy, I shouldn't eat it.

I worked out 3 times again this week and I'm extremely proud of that. I'm going for 4 this week.

The scale went down 1.2 pounds this week despite the fact that I didn't track everything I ate. Why? Because I'm aware of what I'm eating and that what I eat is healthy and I know what I'm doing.

I'm proud of how far I've come and I'm listening to my body.

Life is pretty good.